Conversations: Jesus and … Mary and Martha with love

(John 11:17–44)

There are so many natural disasters that befall different parts of the world. Then there are road accidents or situations that maybe you have witnessed or unfortunately have been a part of. I hear stories from people who have been so close to being in an accident, but also sad stories of those who seem to be in the “wrong place at the wrong time”. We hear stories on the news about people being stabbed while shopping, walking along the street and being hit by a car. A few years ago, there was the story about children walking to get ice-cream and a drunk driver hitting them and killing four children.

Share some stories that maybe have happened to you or to friends or loved ones.

What were your reactions? For those affected – what were their reactions?

In many cases it seems that our natural response is to blame God for the tragedy and for not being there at that time to protect or stop the disaster from happening. We feel that someone needs to be at fault and responsible for the pain that we are going through. Mary and Martha, Jesus’ close friends are no different when their brother Lazarus dies.

Read together John 11:17–37

What was the response of Martha?

Martha, it seems was wanting to see Jesus, she went out to meet him and immediately gave him a piece of her mind. In verse 21: “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died …”, but then she continued: “But even now God will give you whatever you ask.”

What was Martha wanting Jesus to do? Discuss her faith or lack of faith.

Read again John 11:23–27

In groups of two or three, discuss Jesus’ reaction to Martha and the conversation that took place between the two for a couple minutes.

Was Martha understanding?

Find a few words that describe this situation and Martha’s understanding of the situation.

Come back to the large groups and discuss what was talked about in the small groups.

Martha was a Jew who understood the Jewish law and had read the Scriptures and even though she had been busy earlier in Luke 10:38–42 (read), I am sure she was listening in the background to what Jesus was saying. She knew that on the last day God will raise all believers from the dead. But Jesus wasn’t speaking of what would happen on the last day, he was sharing that he would raise Lazarus, that God would be glorified.

Read together John 11:25

Who has heard this passage before? When?

How does this affect you and make you feel?

Read now together Martha’s response in verse 27.

This is an incredible statement of faith. To be able to say this, is what God wants from each of us. Can you say this? Could you say this to Jesus even after losing a loved one?

Let us now read through Mary’s response in John 11:28–32

Reading through the passage again, it is interesting that Mary was so distraught that she seemed to be sulking and didn’t want to talk to Jesus. She only went out to see him when Martha called to her. And the first thing she said to Jesus in verse 32 is: “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died”. She blames Jesus for the death of her brother.

What do you notice about the initial responses of both Martha and Mary? (verses 21 and 32)

They seem to be exactly the same, why do you suppose this is?

Women talk and share their feelings. What one person says is often repeated by another. The women were hurt and had obviously been talking about Jesus and why he wasn’t there to help them when they had called for him to come to heal Lazarus when he was sick.

Read: John 11:1–6

Break into your small groups again and discuss the following thoughts for a couple minutes.

Discuss what has happened in these six verses.

Now, relate this knowledge to the responses of the two women later when Jesus actually came to their house.

Do you think the women were justified in their responses to Jesus?

How would you have felt?

Last month’s Bible study was about the story of Jairus’ daughter. Jesus was also called to come but dilly-dallied. Like this story (Luke 8:40–42, 49), Jesus was called to help when the person was sick, but only once they had died did Jesus come and raised them from the dead.

Why do you think Jesus did that?

Read John 11:4

Bring your responses back to the large group.

It seems then in the following verse (John 11:33), that Jesus went to the practical. He witnessed the pain and grief of both Mary and Martha and now wanted to ease their pain. But Jesus also suffered and grieved as they did, which lead to his response: “Jesus wept”. We read in the Gospels that it is only recorded that Jesus wept twice: (John 11:35 and Luke 19:41). He cried once over Jerusalem and its lost people and then once at the death of Lazarus.

Knowing that Jesus cries together with those who mourn, what does that change about the person of Jesus? Does this surprise you knowing that Jesus (Son of God) has human emotions? How do you feel about this?

Read together: John 11:38–44

It is interesting that the words Jesus speak to the people are commands:

• “Take away the stone” (verse 39)
• “Did I not tell you that if you believed, you would see the glory of God?” (verse 40)
• “Father, I thank you that you have heard me …” (verses 41b-42)
• “Lazarus, come out!” (verse 43b)
• “Take off the grave clothes and let him go.” (verse 44b)

Jesus speaking with such authority helps us to know that even though he had compassion and grieved with those who mourned, he was in control of the whole situation.

Go back to the beginning of the Bible study with the natural disasters and situations and tragedies that happen without any reason or explanation.

What now could be the response you give to others when they blame God?

Read again: John 11:4 and John 11:41

Does God make bad things happen?

Could he stop the bad things from happening?

The answer is that God does not make bad things happen. It is our sin that causes these things. Could he stop them? Yes – God can do all things. Why doesn’t he? A very good question, but God knows everything, and we should not suppose that we can understand God’s will or his purpose. We do not understand God’s mind or reason for things that happen. We are called to just trust and have faith in God: And we know in all things God works for the good of those who love him … Romans 8:28a

To close the study, have one person read: Isaiah 40:28–31

Prayer: Loving Jesus, you love us completely. You grieve when we mourn. But we know in all things you are in complete and sovereign control of your world. Help us to understand when tragedies and bad things occur, that it is not your fault, but rather our original sin and disobedience. Forgive us for our wrongdoing and lead us to understand your love more completely. Bless our time of learning and bring us back next time to learn more about you. In your name, Amen.

Pray the Lord’s Prayer to finish.

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